Erasmus was nervously refreshing the results page of his school’s website. That stats exam had made a mockery of everything he’d ever thought he’d learned in class. He was hoping beyond his deepest prayers that he’d at least passed the class, which was now looking like a massive blockade rather than the last hurdle before freedom from academia.

His phone rang. It was his coursemate, Rohit.

“Bro, have you seen yours yet?”

“Brother, I haven’t. I am so nervous, man. I don’t need my amma giving me sh*t for not passing a mathematics class, man. She’s already pissed off enough about Sandra.”

“Ro, she’s never getting over that. I don’t even know why you made this choice knowing how much she’d want to murder you. The girl is like six years older than you and has three kids. Did you not learn anything growing up, man?”

“Dude, I’m telling you, she almost cursed me to death when she saw me, man. I’m not even going there until I have five days left.”

“Man, good luck with that. Meanwhile, I’ve been refreshing this damn page for the last ten minutes, man. What the hell? Didn’t they say it would be up by midnight tonight?”

“Yeah, like my life if my mother ever finds out that I’m in India and haven’t come home yet.”

“Have you gone to Sandra’s place yet?”

“No, I’m still at my old work buddy’s place. Sandra’s coming here in two days, and then we go to Philippines for a week.”

“Man, you really want to die. You really like to- they’re here! The results are finally up!”

Erasmus scrolled impatiently down the page, looking for the results column. “YES! I made it! I got an A!”

“You got an A? Mo-therrr-f*cker! Congratulations Ras.”

“Have you seen yours yet?”

“I’m scrolling through now. Wait, I just saw it. I got a B minus.”

“You made it! My man!”

“Professor Choi must’ve curved the f*ck out of this cos I didn’t do well enough to earn this.”

“Maybe he figured most of us were about to graduate and decided to give us a break. But I don’t care, cos I frickin’ passed! Graduation is coming!”

“Yeah yeah, you got an A, you’re the new high school homecoming queen, blah blah.”

“Kiss my ass, Ro.”

“Gladly, motherf*cker.”

“Wait till your amma finds out where you are right now.”

“Whatever, dude. By the way, have you gotten a job yet, Ras?”

Erasmus’ mood immediately shifted at the question, and he became sombre. “Nah man, still looking.”

“What! Half of the class already has their job waiting. They just need the work visas to come in. What’s taking you so long?”

Erasmus almost went into a tirade, but then he found enough restraint to pull back. “Ro, you know what the market’s like.”

“That’s true, man. Sorry. I just don’t want you to go through what I’ve seen some people go through. It can get real sh*tty, man.”

“I know, Ro.”

“Well, once I start with mine, I’ll try to see if I can talk someone into getting you in.”

“I appreciate that, Ro.”

“Alright, man. I’m going to go drink and celebrate. Congrats man. We’re officially done with three years of hell!”

“Don’t let some random chick rob you this time.”

“F*ck you. Bye!”

***

Stella was setting up the cameras for church service that night when Josh walked into the sanctuary. “Janice! How are you today, Janice?”

Josh kept walking but Stella persisted. “Janice, how’s it going? Is everything okay?”

Josh still ignored her, which only made her want to continue even more. “Janice, I’m greeting you oo. Don’t be rude.”

Josh finally turned to her, and the look of complete sorrow on his face hit her with all its force.

“Did someone die?”

Josh said nothing and sat down on the floor at the altar. Stella stopped her work and went over to him. She wanted to ask again, but she saw his face and knew it had to be really bad. So she sat next to him on the altar and waited.

Josh sat for a long minute in the solemn mood. Stella remained in her spot, but she was mindful of how much time was left before service began.

“I don’t know for sure, but I think Bishop Wilson is leaving.”

Stella kept looking straight ahead of her. “Leaving where? The house?”

“Leaving the church, Stella. I don’t think he’s going to be here much longer.”

“Josh. I don’t mean to sound silly cos I know you live with him, but how do you know this?”

“I just know, Stella.”

Stella got up from the altar and extended her hand to Josh. “Josh, if it happens, it really wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. But given how much instability this church has seen, I don’t think it’s going to happen. It will break the church if it does. Now, service starts in 10 minutes and you’re doing opening prayer. We can worry about this later.”

***

FOUR YEARS AGO

Archbishop Rhamses King had had it with the ridiculousness that was the board meeting that he was currently in. Discussing the state of affairs of the branches of City of Faith across the globe was usually an exercise in sifting through bull crap, but this one had gotten out of hand.

What was meant to be a strategic meeting had turned into an episode of lamentations about church people. It was as though they’d all forgotten that he started from scratch. The excuses ranged from people not being interested in church to the onslaught of demonic attacks from territorial spirits. It was so irksome to Rhamses just how inept they all were.

“…And Papa, I think its time we talked about the Chatswick branch. Papa, news of the scandals that they’ve faced have spread and affected us all. We go for evangelism, the people hear the name of our church, and then immediately they walk away. One of my members was even spat on, papa. Something needs to be done about that branch. And due respect, none of the pastors there would do. None of them have the-”

“Who do you think you are to be measuring someone’s level? Huh? You that you can’t even manage a church of 50 people, you want to now try to bid for a church of 500? Are you serious?”

Before Rhamses could step in, the storm escalated exponentially and reached a level right before fisticuffs. Exasperated, he got up and walked out of the room, with his guard and his personal counsel, Simpson Sowah in tow.

“Pastor Simpson, please let the guys know I’ll be back earlier than expected. We’re doing twelve hours non-stop, so tell them to prepare.”

Simpson left to execute the order. Meanwhile, Rhamses remained outside the door, annoyed to bits with the obviously worse commotion inside. “Lord, please let Wilson be good on Sunday. Please Lord, for the sake of the sanity of your son. Let him be good.”

***

PRESENT DAY

Wednesday evening service had begun in earnest at Honest City Church, and the worship team was ministering in its usual fervor. Minister Sally was belting out the chorus to My Worship, and she had the room in tears by the time they got to the bridge. The room was half full, but it felt and sounded like a capacity crowd in there. The congregation was deep in worship, and it looked set to be another powerful service.

Behind the stage, Josh paced back and forth, trying to cool down after delivering a scalding-hot opening prayer session. John, the other intercessor who’d backed him up, was fidgeting with his phone while seated, waiting for the next portion of the service.

“Why are you guys here? Don’t you have to go and bring Bishop from his office?” Stella looked genuinely lost at the sight of the two guys backstage. Their very presence there was a huge problem.

Josh just kept pacing while John looked at Stella. “Apparently, we don’t have to. We are exactly where we need to be.”

Stella got even more confused. “What do you mean?”

John turned to Josh. “Jump in anytime, osofo. I’m not sure how to explain it to her.”

Josh walked to a bewildered Stella and showed her a message on his phone. It was from First Lady Ellen McQueen. “Last-minute change. Bishop won’t be there today. There will be a guest preacher. If he doesn’t make it, bishop wants the guys to take turns ministering.”

“I guess he’s giving you guys more responsibility now. That’s a good thing.”

Josh raised his eyebrow at her and shook his head. John cackled in his throat and put his head in his hands. Stella saw both their reactions and was still confused. “What? What am I missing here?”

“Stella. Between you and I, bishop McQueen is going to papa’s house tonight with Lady Ellen.”

“And?”

“Well, Papa was meant to come here this coming Sunday, but he suddenly had a trip with bishop Bremah which made him cancel.”

“Okay.”

“Archbishop hasn’t scheduled anything anywhere. Bishop Bremah is in New York preaching right now. You can check their livestream.”

Stella paused immediately. She took out her phone and checked and saw Bishop Bremah making declarations at the New York branch. “Wait. What?”

Josh finally arrived at the thing that had both he and John nonchalant. “The last time this happened, it was to remove Bishop Selorm and replace him with Bishop McQueen. Same excuse, same timing, same thing.”

Stella looked at the livestream of Bishop Bremah preaching as the realization hit her. “Are they really thinking of doing this?”

Hmmm, it gets realer and realer with each passing episode. It’s pretty clear this decision won’t go down well if it’s announced. What’s gonna happen? And it doesn’t look like Erasmus is having it easy getting a job. Man, that’s rough…