“So chale, I pick am for the Spanner junction there, wey I take am go house. She still dey there dey do ein body ‘my boyfriend won’t be happy’ and all that, wey I tell am sey make she shon that thing. As she follow me come my house diɛɛ, she know what dey go on, so make she shon that ‘my boyfriend, my boyfriend’ matter. She keep quiet. E no kyɛ wey we go the room, wey I play some small music make she dance give me. Na chale, the way the ass dey go on for the G-string inside, eh? Aboowa! Na my head dey spin sef!”
Damien and the other boys snickered as they paid rapt attention to this tale of Karnal.
It was about 7 pm, and Damien was at the famous Gels Bridge with his friends. It had been a while since all six friends had met, with national service and all other kinds of commitments separating them for a while. Now that they were all back in Accra, they had decided to meet at their favourite spot and catch up.
And if there was one thing this squad loved to talk about among themselves, it was their bedroom exploits.
Whenever they had these kinds of meet-ups, talk of the latest girls, whom they nicknamed as ‘consignments’, that they had slept with was as inevitable as getting taxed. And for this evening, Karnal had opened the floodgates with the story of this ‘consignment’ – one famous TikTok girl known only for having a great backside and how he had lured her to his house to get down and dirty with her.
“Na guys, the way I smash the tin! Alaa! I no enjoy like that before. Chale, the ass no be hype, ibi sweet ankasa. Whaaaat! Now the consignment dey text me pass. Every day, Ɛna she dey won come over. One time, I biz am sey ‘what about your boyfriend?’ You know what she tell me? ‘Please, forget about that boy’.”
“YIE-YIEEEEEEEE!” the boys cheered, impressed by Karnal’s successful conquest. A number of them knew the girl in question, and were pleased to know one of their own had successfully conquered her.
“Chale, the last time I see that girl ein video for TikTok, the way my body come eh,” one of the boys, Kazuka, commented as he took a swig out of his Orijin bottle. “Chale, na she dey shake the ass better. Alaa!”
“See, Kazu, that one sef, na she dey wear some sexy jeans shorts. See, if you see am in real time, nothing but G string, eh, you go bow. The ass dey form.”
“Chale, make I see top, eh. Throw am give me.”
“Oh, abi you sey I no go brown you on that one. The girl diɛɛ, she be for the streets, so no yawa!”
“Aaaaaaah, the streets!”
Damien guffawed as the boys began to chant ‘streets’. He had really needed this; some time with the boys.
I’m so glad I made it here. Yeah, paying for the Uber was a bit painful, but chale, if it keeps me from getting worried by these motorcycle guys, it’s good. At least they don’t get the chance to heckle me when I’m in a car...
***
“Ah! So Vivica too, she be yawa girl like that?”
“Chale, I shock sef! She be yawa passsss! Ibi the respect myself part sef wey dey bore me. Ɛna I respect myself, okay, I respect myself. Forkin girl!”
“Chale, Damien, forget am! Right now, we no dey waste time on girlies them dey do dema body Virgin Mary. More girlies dey there wey dema eye open. Dawg am kraaa!”
“That be all. Kwasia geh. We dey search better c**t chop aa, you dey there dey talk what? Make she f**k off plus ein respect! Aboa funu!”
Damien snickered at the vicious lash from his boys. Nothing irked them more than girls who were not up for dropping their panties for them. They’d spew the most vile abuse on such girls. After Karnal’s story, where he even called the girl and let them listen as she asked him to come and pick her later that night, the attention turned to him, as the boys enquired if he had gotten Vivica into bed.
Suffice to say, they weren’t amused by her no sex before marriage stance at all.
“Oh, at this point, I dawg am kraa. She fool too much,” he confirmed. “She make lucky sef sey she block me before I send the voice note. Like she go start dey question ein whole existence. Gyimi-gyimi girl!”
“But you, Damien, your matter no good kraa oo,” one of his friends, Amofa, commented with a mischievous smirk on his face as he placed his phone on the table. “Every move biaa you get plus some consignment dey paska. Wey you san go dey some village for like one year. You diɛɛ, nothing better dey go on give you ooo!”
As the others laughed at this comment, Damien smirked and shook his head. “You be sure?”
“Ei. Why, you go get some old consignment c**t for the Donkorkrom there?”
While some of the boys laughed harder and others scolded Amofa for that crass question, Damien simply shook his head and reached into his pocket for his other phone. Comments like this were not alien to Amofa’s lips, and they could be infuriating. But he had the perfect counter attack to that.
He confidently opened the photo gallery, opened up the first picture of Lily and handed it over to them. “This one be old lady, abi?”
His friends had their jaws hanging as they checked out the picture of Lily. She was in that crochet crop top and booty shorts she wore the last time Damien was with her, so every bit of her curves was plain for them to see.
“Abooowa! See body!”
“Heeerrrrrhhhhhh! This be what you dey call boobs! Whaaat!”
“Alaaa, ass paa nie!”
As expected, they were going gaga over the pictures. And Damien couldn’t be more pleased with the reaction. Now it was time to land the final blow.
“Chale, gimme my phone make I show you guys something else,” he ordered, an air of arrogance about him. “I know sey this foolish boy dey come talk sey I just look wey I no do nothing. Make I show you proof sey I smash that ass before.”
He scrolled to a video and turned it on whilst lowering the volume to prevent others from hearing.
The boys gathered round and watched in awe at the lewd video Damien had secretly recorded during one of his heated sessions with Lily. Eyes wide with lust and spellbound wonder, they took in the view of him holding her hair as he aggressively banged her from behind.
“Herh, Damien. You really f**k the tin oo. Aboowa!”
“Chale, ibi the moaning sef dey kill me. The girl dey die give your d**k ooo.”
“Kwɛɛɛ, the way she talk the ‘God, your d**k is so good’! Herh, herh, herh! Damien, you be guy!”
“Chale, chale, Damien spoil there!”
At this point, Damien was feeling very good about himself. Especially with the accolades the boys were raining on him. One of the reasons he had shown up that evening was to ensure they put some respect on his name. As Amofa had indicated, they knew him to often have bad encounters with girls. So his passionate moments with Lily had to be brought up to lessen the Vivica disappointment.
And boy, did it do more than that! They now saw Damien as a bona fide playa!
Twenty minutes of chatting about more escapades with other ‘consignments’ followed. Then suddenly Amofa got up, picking up his phone. “Chale, I dey go piss come.”
***
As Amofa entered the washroom, he sighed and began to work on something on his phone.
“I’m sorry, Damien, I really am,” he muttered to himself, “but chale, my hands are tied. If I didn’t do this, what Nico Blaze go take do me eh… hmmm. But you too, you messop, papa. Top shatta ein kiddie sis wey you dey f**k basabasa like that. Chale, you really messop.”
A minute or two, and the job was done.
Amofa sighed again, shrugged and slipped the phone into his pocket. “Chale. Too bad for you, Damien. Too bad.”
***
“DA F**K? THIS FOOL ACTUALLY TOOK A VIDEO OF HIM F**KING MY SISTER AND SHOWED IT TO HIS FRIENDS FOR FANS! WHAT THE ABSOLUTE F**K!”
Lamidi, Mazda and Sidon watched on as their ‘big man’ rose from his chair in a rage, absolutely incensed by the audio that had just been sent to him by the mole hanging out with Damien and co.
They had known him for a long time, and had seen the numerous sides to him, so they were no strangers to seeing an angry Nico Blaze. But this was another level of fury they were witnessing.
But who could blame him? They had all heard as the audio Amofa sent him revealed that he had a secret sextape, and his shameless sharing of it to the boys. There were levels to degrading a girl’s dignity, and surely this idiot had dragged that of Nico’s dear cousin into the mud.
“Chale, this boy really f**k up. Big time,” Mazda murmured.
“I swear. Chale, this one, Nico go fit kill am sef,” Lamidi agreed.
Nico turned to them immediately. They could see the blazing fire in his eyes.
The guy was more than ready to deal with the fool. And it was gonna be extremely bloody.
He stomped over to them, ready for all-out war on Damien. “Mazda! Call the Amofa guy right now! Biz am where them dey, then the route that foolish boy go pass! Look sharp! Sidon, Lamidi, gather the f**king army! Walahi, if I no hurt this boy before daybreak, make you people call me Megan Fox! Aboa like that! Ibi my little sis ein dignity you dey take claim fans? He go see ein sorrmi! Move, move, move!”
Chale! Nico is blazing! And who would have thought there’d be a mole among Damien’s friends? The boy is in major danger!
